Following is a poem that Sammy wrote for me.

The Sound of Love

Some people say it differently
Some people yell
Some people scream
Some people let out a whole bunch of steam
Just to say I love you
But my mom knows how
She says it just right
She always brings light to a dark room.
Now I’m not scared of the boom that comes out when I get angry.
My mom loves me & I love her.

By Sam
I love (drawn with a heart) you mom.

I don’t know what prompted Sammy to write this poem, but it came on the heels of the very positive letter he sent me. He gave it to me last Sunday when Hannah and I went to visit him. He asked to give it to me as soon as we got there.

The letter he sent me was shocking enough, and this has me scratching my head. As I stated in my previous blog, I don’t let myself get my hopes up because history has shown that there will likely be a crash coming down after this.

I don’t mean to sound negative about a beautiful poem, but this is my reality. The poem shows that Sammy has a sweet and vulnerable side to him that he doesn’t let out nearly often enough.

I have been a writer most of my life. I have expressed many feelings and thoughts through writing and it was a major outlet for me in high school. I have encouraged Sammy to do this as well, and I think it’s a wonderful outlet for kids in general. So many of us think that poetry has to rhyme and be a certain format, but poetry is beautiful in that there are no rules. Allowing our kids to do this can get them express things they may never be able to do with the spoken word. It is less vulnerable to open yourself up on paper rather than speaking. You can always erase, or hit the backspace, and make changes or corrections that you can’t do when you speak.

Often times therapists encourage trauma victims or abuse victims to write a letter to their abuser or attacker, even if it is never sent. The simple release of the words can lead to a release of emotions, and in many cases a release of anger as well.

Sammy’s poem contains no anger, but he addresses his own anger. Read the second last line again. “Now I’m not scared of the boom that comes out when I get angry.” How interesting in a poem about love he talks about his anger. For so many of our kids these two things go hand in hand. In their birth homes they might be told that they were loved, only to be abused later. The fact that we have stuck with Sammy through his extreme anger is how he knows we love him.

What does love sound like in your house?

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