Many children who come into foster care have issues with sleep. Usually it means that they do not want to sleep. Many of our children were hurt during the night or in their rooms, so the bedroom is not a safe place.

Children will lay awake at night to watch for the abuser, despite your claims that they will be safe. Trust and some attachment needs to happen before a child will be able to sleep. There are several things you can do to help your child.

Music or white noise – For some children, the silence of night time is scary. It helps to be able to listen to some kind of music or white noise. These days there are many CDs you can buy just for that purpose. Classical music also works well, and many people say it helps with brain development as well.

A night light – Staring into the dark and not knowing what the sounds are can be frightening. Have you ever stayed somewhere or moved into a new house and were startled by a strange noise? Our kids feel the same way when they come to a new home. All the sounds are new to them. Having music can help with this as well as the light. There are some people who say that kids can not sleep with light in their room, but I do it to help a child feel safe.

Alarms – If a child was hurt during the night, putting an alarm on the door to let them know if someone enters the room may help to ease fears. Expect the child to test this several times to make sure that you hear the alarm.


Aromatherapy – I am a big fan of the “Sleep” line by Bath and Body Works and my kids love it to. It is a vanilla and lavender scent that you spray in the room, or on your bed linens. Other manufacturers have a similar product. This is just the one that we like. You can also do aroma therapy in shampoo and body wash.

Medication – If your child is really having difficulty sleeping, you may want to check with your child’s doctor and see if medication is in order. Other parents have used Melatonin with great success.

Co-Sleeping – Some children will feel more comfortable sleeping in your room close to you. Others may be afraid if the abuser was a parent. The child doesn’t have to be in your bed. Sometimes just being in the same room makes a child feel more secure. Some foster care and adoption agencies only allow co-sleeping with children up to a certain age, so be sure to check with your agency to make sure you are not violating your agreement. You may be able to get an exception if you discuss this with your worker.

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