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I love Food Network. I love to cook for big groups and I love to bake, so this is a great TV channel for me, and it’s safe for the whole family.
Recently I picked up an issue of Quick & Simple magazine and there was an article about Sandra Lee, who is the host of her own show called Semi Homemade.
What made this article interesting is that Sandra’s early life was that of our kids. When she was two years old her mother, who she refers to as Vicky throughout the article rather than mom, dropped her and her siblings off at her grandmother’s house and left. They didn’t hear from Vicky again for four years.
Vicky and her new husband picked up Sandra and her siblings and once again took custody of them. More children were born after Sandra was reunited with her mother, and Sandra quickly became the care taker to all the children.
By the time she was nine years old, she was being physically abused by her step-father as well as her mother. She describes being beaten with a belt and having a wooden spoon broken while she was being beaten. Her sister Cindy was beaten so hard with the wooden spoon that it left a shard imbedded in her thigh which became infected. On the way to the doctor Vicky told Cindy to lie about what happened.
At the age of nine Sandra took care of Vicky while she had a miscarriage in their home. Depression took hold of Vicky and the marriage ended, which left Sandra in charge of the household and all the children. She was twelve years old. She worked odd jobs to contribute extra money to the house, did all the cooking, cleaning and shopping for the entire family.
The breaking point came at the age of fifteen when Vicky and Sandra had a verbal confrontation and Vicky beat Sandra to the point that she could not go to school. Fortunately her boyfriend intervened and got her out of the house. Sandra called the grandmother who raised her and gave her the good memories that she had of her childhood. The kids were split up, and the article ends there.
I’m disappointed in the ending. We know somewhat know what happened to Sandra. She went on to a very successful career, but what about the other kids? The article says it was adapted and reprinted with permission from “Made From Scratch” by Sandra Lee. Maybe the book gives more details.
There are several quotes from Sandra that struck me and I think they are things that everyone who has lived through this type of situation can learn from.
“I wouldn’t change anything because that would change who I am. If anything had been different, it would have deprived me of the knowledge.”
That is a very empowering statement.
“You need to realize you’re going through a difficult patch. It’s not your whole life – it’s a moment. You need to step out of it and ask, ‘What am I learning here?’”
This is where so many of our kids get “stuck”. They can’t or won’t get past the bad stuff and realize what they could make of their lives if they tried. It’s hard to get out of victim mentality and take your own power back.
“Having a bad day? It’s OK to indulge… You can’t do it every day, but sometimes you have to reward yourself.”
This is something we can all learn from.
And lastly…
“Do something every day that matters…. Life is short. So don’t waste it!”
If you’ve ever watched one of her shows you know how much she values family. She talks about her nieces and nephews and has had them on the show with her. I will now watch her show with a different perspective and with great admiration for what she has made of her life.
Photo credit – magazine cover
