One of the many home repairs that I have done over the past 2 days, has been to repair damage that Sammy has done to our home.

Door where the bottom was kicked out

Normally, I would be more than happy to let the damage sit, but we have our house up for sale, and I can’t have people coming through with his room being destroyed.

We have had more damage than I can possibly recount, but here a few things I CAN remember. A cell phone, dishes (intentional, not accidental), windows (we replaced them three or four times then finally put Plexiglas over the window. When he couldn’t kick that, he broke a blade off the ceiling fan, and used it to smash the Plexiglas), the banister surrounding the stairs on the upper level has been ripped off three or four times, my car tire, the passenger side door, numerous holes in numerous walls, his bedroom door, and list goes on and on.

We are into several thousand dollars in damage. We finally quit keeping track.

Damage to the wall- 3 feet by 3 feet

What do you do if your child damages your property? You have a few options, and it’s up to you which route you choose.

• Have your child repair the damage. This is OK if the damage is a small dollar value, or is a fairly simple procedure.

• Have your child pay for repairs. Again, depends on the age of the child, and the severity of the damage. Does your child have a savings account that he or she could take money out of, or a job to earn money? I highly recommend having your child hand over the cash to the person doing the repairs. There is something about seeing the money leaving their hands that makes a greater impact on them. If you do the repairs yourself, your child can pay for materials, and an amount for labor that you set. Some parents allow the child to do chores around the house to earn the money. That has never worked in our case because he either refused to do the chores, or did such a horrible job that it ended up being another control battle.

• Call the police and press charges. This is a tricky one. We did this on several occasions, and it turned out to be a giant pain for us. In WI, a child under the age of 15 is only liable for $250 worth of damage, per event. That doesn’t come close to covering some of the events we have had. As the parent of the offender, you have little or no rights. Often children will be assigned community service work in addition to the restitution. This adds another hassle for you of getting your child to and from the job.

Sammy's room after repairs are made.

In some cases foster parents can collect on insurance policies, but once a child is adopted you lose that ability.

A lot of this depends on whether or not your child is remorseful. For some children, none of these will have an impact, and the damage will continue, but hopefully, this will give you some ideas.