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Each child is unique, but with children who have trauma in their background extra care needs to be taken while trying to educate them.
I went with my niece to get her registered for her first year of high school today. It was a very difficult day for her, because as a result of a custody battle she will be attending a new high school and moving in with her dad. The tears in her eyes all through the process told me everything she couldn’t say.
This beautiful young woman has had her mother in her life from the very beginning, so she is far less traumatized than kids from foster care, but her emotions show just how hard some transitions can be for our kids.
So how do you help your child and the teacher?
Meet with the teacher before school starts and explain your child’s needs. It may be as simple as desk placement, or as complex as severe learning disabilities.
Discuss disciplinary tactics. You know what works and doesn’t work for your child. Most teachers will appreciate knowing what tactics to use.
Establish a method for communication. Most teachers will be open to discussing what method of communication you prefer, how often you’d like to hear from the teacher, and what you want to hear about.
Discuss your child’s strengths and weaknesses. There may be something that the teacher can use to motivate your child. Sammy is strong in reading and loves working with little children. This was used as a motivation technique for him. If his behavior was on track, he was allowed to help tutor younger children in reading.
Let your child know that you and the teacher will be communicating. Some children try to triangulate parents and teachers, so knowing that there will be communication helps to reduce this.
Discuss potential “trauma triggers” with the teacher. Are there certain words or situations that are hard on your child? Our foster son, Kory, was triggered by the word “nap”. If someone told him that he had to take a nap, this would result in a full blown screaming tantrum. We suspect there was abuse around nap time. Alert the teacher if there are similar things that you know will be difficult for your child.
Whatever you can do to help prepare both the teacher and your child will make the school year easier for everyone.
