There are some myths about foster care adoption. Let’s look at the reality of these myths.

Only older children or teens are available for adoption – Really there are children of all ages who are waiting for homes. Older children and teens are higher in number than younger children. The average age of a child waiting for adoption is about eight years old, but that is the average. That means there are children on either side of that age that are available. If you are looking to adopt a younger child you may have to wait longer for a placement, but younger children do need homes as well.


There is a long wait involved in adoption – The longest wait is to complete the training and home study. The training classes that you will have to complete are on a set schedule and that can not be done more quickly. The length of wait to have your child join your home will depend on the qualifications you have set on the child joining your home. Obviously, the older the child the shorter the wait time will be. The other factor is what disabilities or disorders you are willing to work with. Not every home is willing to work with physical disabilities so the wait time for these children may be shorter. If you are looking for a child with no “special needs” you may have a longer wait.

Only handicapped children are available for adoption – When adopting from foster care, it is sometimes called “special needs” adoption. That does not mean that every child has physical or emotional “handicaps.” The definition of special needs is much different when it comes to foster care adoption. In most states, special needs means:

1) The child is over the age of 5 – 8 years old or
2) A sibling group that needs to be placed together
3) A child from a minority group

All of these issues can qualify a child as special needs in addition to, or in place of physical or emotional disabilities.

You have to be perfect to adopt – You do not have to be a middle class couple with a fancy home and a white picket fence. “Normal” people adopt children every day. My husband and I are not perfect, believe me. We were not perfect when we adopted Sammy. We lived in the same home we are in now, but we had the upstairs of our house as an apartment and rented it out. I was working outside the home and we had never been parents before. There are no picket fences anywhere near our home. We have made mistakes in our parenting along the way, but every parent does. Workers are not looking for only couples that are making $100,000 a year or more and have perfect driving records, manicured lawns, and a spotless house. They want real people.

Adopting from foster care is expensive – Adopting from foster care is one of the “cheapest” types of adoption you could pursue. In most states there is no cost for home study. There could be a home study cost if you decide to use a private agency to do your study. Most states allow a reimbursement of up to $2000 in non-recurring expenses. You will have to check with your state for the amount, and what are considered non-recurring expenses. You usually do not pay for attorney costs, unless you choose to consult an attorney and in some cases, even the cost of the new birth certificate is covered.

There may be many more myths, but these are the main ones that I hear on a regular basis. If you have other questions or myths, don’t hesitate to ask.

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