Pat has been Sammy’s foster mom for the past seven months. She has been a gem to work with. We have not had any conflicts and have been in agreement with how to handle Sammy on every occasion.
Pat has been dealing with special needs and foster kids for over thirty five years. She started out as a social worker, then became a supervisor, then worked in a group home, and now is doing treatment foster care.
She has seen the progression of issues in kids. At one point when we were talking she said that the worst kid on her caseload thirty years ago wouldn’t even qualify for foster care now. It’s an incredible statement in how society has changed, and how much more damaged our kids are now.
Pat has been my affirmation and has helped me maintain my sanity. She has seen the Sammy that I have seen, and she has backed me up in everything I have said. She has lived my life and has the same thoughts that I have. This is a blessing, because I know too many parents who have had a child in treatment foster care and had to fight tooth and nail with the foster parents.
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Pat has put up with more of Sammy’s behaviors than anyone else I have met. Some days she even surpasses me.
She called me a little while ago. Sammy is headed to respite until his move date on Friday. He has been suspended from school for some very serious behaviors and has been escalating things at her house since he knows he is moving to a new home. I don’t blame her for the decision at all. The interesting thing is that she was apologetic that she couldn’t do more to help him. I don’t blame her at all. We both agree that Sammy has to want to change, and he’s not making any efforts to do that.
I am incredibly grateful to her and in awe of her. I am trying to think of an appropriate way to say thank you for everything she has done for our family, because she truly has helped all of us. Hannah treats her with respect and is comfortable and welcome in her home. I am grateful for that. She has supported and worked with my husband and me. She has tried to make life easier for us with getting Sammy to and from appointments and home visits. She has done part of the driving since it is an hour each way for us. She has taken Sammy to his orthodontic appointments without me ever having to be involved (except for sending in the payment).
I wish everyone was blessed with a “team mate” like Pat.
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