Today we went to go visit Sammy at his new residential placement. In the past I have checked out the placement ahead of time, or very shortly after his placement. I did not do that this time since the facility is well known statewide, I had several good referrals from people I trust, and quite frankly, it doesn’t much matter.

I don’t hold much hope that Sammy is going to be “cured” at whatever facility he is in, but I do check for obvious safety issues, both for Sammy and for the other children.

This facility is ranking high on my “I like this place”... more

The recent edition of Fostering Families magazine has several articles devoted to self-care for foster parents. I am glad to see a national magazine that is recognizing the importance of this.

A book I have been reading, “100 Days of Weight Loss” by Linda Spangle had a section that resonated with me on a personal level rather than a weight loss level. The section is on emotional safety and how to keep yourself “grounded” during... more

As you know, Sunday is Easter. Sammy will not be home for Easter. With his new placement he has a restriction of at least 30 days before he is allowed to leave the grounds of where he is at. We may not even pick him up and go to lunch.

Instead we are traveling to visit him tomorrow after Hannah does an Easter egg hunt. His placement is over 90 minutes away, so it is not a quick or easy trip for a visit.

Sammy has spent a couple of holidays away from home, but they have not really been “major” holidays. There were a couple of Thanksgivings where he... more

It is nine years ago today that Sammy officially moved into our home. I wrote about this a year ago.

My husband and I discussed this on the way to church tonight. In the past year, the only thing that has really changed is that Sammy has been in three difference placements in the past year. Other than that, we’re pretty much in the same “place” we were a year ago.

Sammy’s placement is fairly “stable” at the moment. He does well in an institutional setting like... more

I have seen a couple of news articles saying that the need for male foster parents is on the rise and talking about the advantages of single male foster parents. I happen to agree.

I have a few friends that are single adoptive dads and they are great friends and even better dads. These men foster and adopt boys and especially teen boys, a segment of foster children that is greatly under served.

The last treatment foster home that Sammy was in had a great set up for him. There were three parents in the house, two of which were men. They were the... more

We have some unusual rituals in our house. Most people that hear them would think that we are just this side of insane. We probably are, but not for the reasons they think.

Way back in a former life, when I worked a full time job outside the house, I would drop Sammy off at school on my way to work. I was used to frequent phone calls from school because Sammy had gotten in trouble. Since Sammy is an oppositional child, we did “prescribing the behavior” before we knew it was a valid parenting technique for children like him.

Mornings were one of... more

I saw a thread on one of the adoption boards that asked about good adoption stories. The poster said that all she read were scary stories. Well, most of the people who post on the boards have some kind of problem that they need help with, or need to vent some frustrations. Most people don’t post too often to say that life is wonderful.

There are good adoption stories. We are living one with Hannah, although her story did not start well. She was adopted into a family who loved her tremendously and worked very hard for her to open up her heart and be able... more

In my previous blog I said that I would address the foster care licensing paperwork as a separate blog. The application that I have is fourteen pages long in itself, in addition to all the other paperwork that we need to fill out just to get the home study started.

The licensing checklist also doubles as an informative paper. It lists several different areas of licensing, statutes and regulations and asks that you acknowledge that have read and understand... more

Part 1

As you can tell by the fact that this is a two part blog, the initial paperwork is quite extensive. Here is a continuation of the paperwork that you can expect to fill out.

Releases – if you have worked with any counselors in the past (or currently) the agency may want to contact the counselor and make sure that any condition has been resolved or is currently handled with medication. If the counseling has been related... more

Since our family is going through the home study process ourselves right now, I thought I’d share exactly what’s going on, not just a theoretical version.

We received our application packet from the adoption agency that is doing the home study. It is full of paperwork to be filled out, releases to sign, and other information that we need to provide.

Here is what we have to fill out: The adoption application itself – This asks for general information about residents of the household, contact information, education,... more